The Great British Baking Show
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Justdontscatter fake ballot boxes all over the country.
If we had simplyignoredthe bloviating real-estate con man from New York he might have disappeared decades ago.
We could all simplywear masks!
All of which is to say: Its Chocolate Week in theGreat Britishbaking tent.
White chocolate is as horrible as everyone says!
It is all very exciting a littletooexciting, if you ask me.
For this weeks Signature, everyone is supposed to make 18 brownies.
This is very easy, threatens Paul Hollywood.
If you cant produce a decent brownie, theres going to be problems.
Everyone takes this as a challenge to invent some problems.
Oh, the stress, the stress is too much!
Not to be outdone, Sura drops a tin of her ruby-and-dark-chocolate swirl brownies into the oven.
Prue gives the highest praise to Irish Mark: It tastes like a brownie.
Then she tells him she is avoiding the marshmallow topping.
Other Marc is just extremely sorry.
Weve all made it harder than it needed to be, Lottie sighs.
It is less fun than you might think, to watch everybody fail at the same time.
This is, I think, an accurate portrait of existence.
But this is not what I want fromthe Great British Bake Off.
Bumbling is not drama.
Drama is watching somebody set their oven to the wrong temperature with intensity and purpose.
Anyway, were making chocolate babka.
I dont know what it is, Ive never made one, says Linda, brightly.
I wish I knew what it looked like!
Their twists do not fit in their tins.
How long should a babka rise?
One also wonders if now might be a good time to start a U.K.-based chain bakery specializing in babka.
His babka was delicious but it just didnt have the height for modeling.
Thats two challenges pretty much failed, says Sura, speaking for herself, and also several others.
She really hopes the weather cooperates tomorrow.
The weather does not cooperate.
It is so hot.
Do you know how hot it is?
Thats okay, they will continuously tell you.
We have arrived: babkapalooza has now turned into the shows annual hot episode.
The Showstopper challenge is to make a white chocolate three-tiered celebration cake designed for a particular celebration.
Prue agrees: White chocolate is frankly a nightmare to work with.
Did they mention it is very hot and everything will very likely all melt?
This is the kind of shit Im talking about.
Hot is a problem we have solved through the wonder that is air conditioning.
This show is not rustic in any other way.
They have infinite ingredients and top-of-the-line proofing drawers.
it’s possible for you to air condition a tent, if you’re gonna wanna.
Ask a Texan wedding planner!
These are not hand-wringing obstacles!
In celebration of her grandparents sapphire wedding anniversary, shes making a very complicated white chocolate geode cake.
Dont forget, Prue reassures her.
You only have to be not the worst!
Linda makes an emotional cake in memory of her daughter, using mascarpone and raspberry.
Despite the temperature, which is the opposite of cold, it seems that things are fine.
Marks cake Amarula-pistachio-lemon melange is beautifully made, even if its a little low on oomph.
Lotties abstract geode extravaganza is overbaked but very cool.
Paul thinks Daves cake looks burnt, but then it isnt.
Lindas memorial cake is suitably buttery, and Marcs cake is very pastel.
Hermines cake is delicious.
Deliiiiiiiicccccious Prue raves, repeatedly.
It is deeply raw.
It is profoundly raw.
Mmmmmmmmmmm observes Prue, Britishly.
Paul tells her she did it wrong.
Also, it is lopsided.
There is nothing to be done.
Has Sura really failedthatmuch that she has to go?
wonders a melancholic Paul, and viewers in at least two different nations.
Yes, is the answer.
Nobody wants this to be happening.
Paul says it is a classic case of having a weakness.
