The Bachelorette
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The red flags become literal.
Lets be honest: At this point, Luke should be covered head to toe in red.
That was all it took!
And who hasnt been there?
Time to go finish my masters degree.
Lets get to it.
Hannah and her remaining contesticles head off to Greece for these Fantasy Suites.
First up is Peter.
Poor, sweet Peter (whohas just started to get the Jed treatment).
Hannah is weirdly insistent on the guys telling her the words I + Love + You.
According to my LoveNudge app, there are many different love languages, Hannah.
Words like butthole or Daddy-O or Limp Bizkit.
Peter finally manages to get there and tells Hannah that he loves her.
They head to the Fantasy Suite.
Peter fucking puts in work in that rickety-ass windmill loft.
The next morning, Hannah says that Peter is Zeus and shes the goddess of love, Aphrodite.
Who was … technically Zeuss daughter.
In the morning, Hannah looks a little stiff when shes with Peter, but shes optimistic.
Up next is Tyler.
There is literally an ENTIRE section of the porn website I frequent that is this.
And it WORKED FOR ME.
Is that too much?
Is that too much information because biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch this wasworking.
Which is an admirable position but also … just let yourself have fun.
Have dessert, maam.
HAVE YOU EVER HAD A MAN CELEBRATE YOUR BOUNDARIES?!
I want Tyler C. to throw my boundaries a ticker-tape parade.
The next morning, Hannah says that Tyler was the most respectful man shes ever been with.
Now its time for Jeds Fantasy Suite.
So it doesnt mean as much to make the Fantasy Suites when a garbage person also made it.
You wont be able to cash in on making it this far if it doesnt mean that much.
Jedhas been exposedas a very callous, ruthless person.
In this episode, hes also exposed as a bad actor.
Its all about him.
Its about how Luke being there reflects on Jed.
How it makes him worry about Hannahs decision-making.
In his mind, hes the lead.
She could take this as a sign that maybe her relationship with Luke is … problematic, but no.
Oh, you sweet rube.
Finally, its time for Hannahs Fantasy Suite Date with Luke.
Lets break down Lukes request and Hannahs reaction to it.
That his wants and beliefs are more important than seeing her as a full person.
That calling her out for her potential hypocrisy is his business and his role.
So lets get to Hannahs reaction.
It was certainlyhilarious and meme-ableand Im sure it will be on throw pillows on Etsy by now.
But I couldnt help but notice that there was no examination of how conservative religion created Luke.
How Hannahs desires are in opposition to the teachings of her religion.
He was a man of a particular faith who expressed a desire to control Hannah and manipulate her.
So where does this leave us?
What a spiritual leader!
