Summer House
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And just like that, ladies and loverboys, it is over.
Larl is no more.
RIP, my heart.
This isnt just a prurient detail (though, inquiring minds …).
When Carl arrives at the beach, he talks to Kyle about the situation.
Lindsay, however, seems to want something more like a traditional commitment.
But no, its a dinner?
Where they all sit around lookingMiami Vicewith each other while eating scallops?
Everyone else looks fine.
For my money, Kyle is the most handsome man on Bravo.
(Unless youre sending naked pics of Kyle.)
If she said something, he would be like, What?
The real bad behavior is when everyone goes to Barrys Bootcamp the next day.
She says yes, but that is beside the point.
Carl is grabbing a life preserver even before hes even jumped off the boat.
Could we have not predicted this?
Could we not have spared Lindsay from the indignity?
After all of this, he finally sits her down and says that this should be a friendship.
Carl says she moved too fast and it was too much pressure on him.
I dont think this was all Carls fault, though he is taking most of the blame here.
Lindsay was, and will always be, very intense in a relationship.
Supposedly Jules got into the group via Hannah, who says that she met Jules through Jordan.
This whole thing is a little curious.
He eventually told everyone that his penis doesnt work correctly, which is why he was lying about sex.
Some of the housemates speculated that he lied about sex because hes a virgin.
There is another fan theory that Jordan is in the closet and that is what is causing this.
After theMiami Viceparty, they end up in Jules bed together and get it on.
(Guys, Loverboy is a sparkling hard iced tea.
Dont you know?)
There is a semantic argument to be had about whether or not Jules and Jordan had sex.
As many women know, sex happens at insertion, not orgasm.
However, Jordans motivations for all of this seem really suspect.
The funny thing is that their tryst did exactly the opposite.
Now we all think that he cant get off and maybe, just maybe, thats because hes gay.
At least the virgin rumor is dead, though.
There could be a variety of factors for his less-than-three-raindrops performance, though.
Of course alcohol could play a part.
Maybe his penis was cursed by a gypsy woman he ran down in the street?
None of us can say, really.
None of us can say.
But there is one thing for certain: Jordan is hiding something.
Hannah is not hiding from Luke, who is all up in her grill this week.
Hannah then starts to spiral and thinks she should not tell him about Luke after all.
If theyre casual, why would she?
I think this is a mistake.
I think that Hannah should just tell Armand how she feels and talk about their relationship.
Did you catch when Hannah told everyone to Shut the fuck up!
so she could eavesdrop on their breakup conversation?
That is what I love most about Hannah.
Shes the funny one.
Paige was missed this week even though she has done little this season.
Its like when your Glade PlugIn runs out of juice.
you’ve got the option to tell that something is off but you dont know what.
That is what this episode was like without Paige.
She also told Jordan that it was weird not having him in the house, because its fun.
